ROCKWELL PRESIDENTIAL RACE

After the latest storm, my wife wanted to head to the mountains so she could actually feel like it was winter. So she suggested we have our "once-a-year-everyone-in-the-family-goes-ice-fishing-trip" on Presidents Day. The potential political landscape of lakes had not really excited the masses, so I was unable to offer any campaign promises of many panfish for every pot. Upon consulting with the pundits, Rockport was selected to represent. My expectations were conservative but hopeful.
My first family arrived bright and early (just after lunch) to some slight breezes and sunny conditions. There were many others with their voting tents set up on the west side, but their thinking was rather shallow to me and we headed deeper for our debates as we battled rather thick ice.

I got my youngest set up first (Ninja style) and before the others of us could even start raising funds, he got his first response from the rainbow coalition. The size was moderate, but the support was welcome.

Soon to follow with political action was my first lady, but someone in the field offices didn't set her drag properly and her support was lost at the poling location. I was next to speak at the podium, but my argument was way too small to accept the endorsement. My first lady responded again with excited shouts and a hollers from her exit polls.

I told her she had her position upside down, but "Not when I hold it up to look at myself" she responded. Fair enough I suppose, from her perspective.

My oldest son still had yet to win a majority in any state, so I took that as an opportunity to jump ahead in the polls with some well planned clever rhetoric (as obligated by the act of congress of 1996 stating that parents are duly obligated to verbally challenge their offspring with sarcasm to toughen them up and prepare them for the unfairness of fickle voters) - "I guess you just suck." I needed to have a chat with my speech writers, because my number one son's quick response was winning the vote of the largest state of the day.


The other fishing constituents in the shallow voting booths closed up earlier than we, and as things cooled off my related parties became adversarial and ran negative campaigns. One son bet the other $10,00 that he could win the nomination, but the other side didn't like his "theology." The only honorable thing for two young gentlemen to do was wrestle in the snow.

The sun went behind clouds and it became rather chilly in the afternoon - as were the receptions of any others open to our positions on their death penalty. So we closes up our petitions and headed back to our home states and loving supporters.

We didn't catch many, but we each got a few for our efforts. From what we could tell, others political action groups didn't do better. As reported by others previously, we found fish in water 50-60 ft deep, and about 15 feet down. We sent down tandem rigs with small homemade "rat finkie" and spider types on top and white cutterbugs/gizzilla plastics with glow jig heads.
We were satisfied to just get out, and it was all the more so for me to not have my wife an youngest come home disappointed. Without regard to election results based on patriarchy - sometimes it's great to feel like a king.